Turkey Day Ettiquette: What type are you?!

Happy Turkey Day to everyone!! 

I hope you all enjoyed the day with family and/or friends! 

I went to my Uncle and Aunts house for thanksgiving dinner and met up with family.  Great! Now with that said, I realized there are several various types Thanksgiving food partakers (for lack of a better word). Here we go...

Hoarder:  Pile on as much as they can as fast and they can and hurry in the kitchen because I’m coming back as soon as I scarf this down

The Food Can’t Touch Eater: This person loves the food but oh boy if two foods touch on their plate they will have a melt down… (If you don’t think this person exist think again I watched the meltdown happen it was the most hilarious thing ever lol)

The Picky Eater: This is the person that walks around slowly peeking under pot tops, lifting aluminum foil, poking at food. The pick eater has to closely survey EVERY thing…then when they do fix their plate they only eat certain things. This person sometimes frowns upon others because they eat something that the Picky Eater does not.

The Dieter: This is the person that comes in and proclaims they are on a diet and they can only eat certain things and only a little of this and a little of that…*please note* by the end of the day this person has morphed into the Hoarder.

Bird Eater: This is the person that that will make a regular plate and for some reason they can never finish it.  You can usually find the Bird Eater with a lot of napkins around where they have chewed food and spit out or you might find their paper/Styrofoam plate face down in the trash as to not to alert anyone they didn’t eat all of their food.

The Mouth Wide Open Eater:  This is the person that could be one of the above however, since all the family is around the table perhaps swapping stories from past this person just has to chime in the only thing is…they have a mouth full of food! #FAIL usually bits of cornbread or some other food comes spewing out as everyone looks on with a blank stare. This person usually thinks the looks of everyone is because of their awesome story but it not on the contrary.

Grab & Go Eater: These are family members or friends that make it his or her own personal mission to see how many thanksgiving dinners they can make it too.  They usually eat a small amount (to leave room for other visits). They pack a plate like a hoarder and next thing you know they have their aluminum foiled wrapped plate, coat on  and they are waving goodbye to everyone while heading to their next target.

Last but not least…

The Desserter:  This is the person that is probably one of the above but will also partake in indulging in a hunkin piece of every desert and gluttonously groan, “mmm’s and ahh’s” while eating.

OK, so what type are you?  Are you willing to admit it :)

My truth:

       You know this time of year for me is a bit bittersweet for me.  When I was younger it was always so exciting… yeah but not so much anymore.  Wait, wait I know what your thinking don’t be like that…and I don’t mean in the horrible, but  the generation or generations before myself used to always make sure the family was gathered and everyone was in attendance.  Well that generation has grown a lot older some have gone to be with the Lord and others just can’t do it anymore.  I must be honest this saddens me.  A lot of my family has moved and we are all scattered.

      Now this is the second Thanksgiving I’ve had since my separation and divorce.  I have to honestly say,   I don’t miss that part  ¯\(ツ)/¯

Hey I’m just being honest…but it was the first holiday I was separated from my daughter…although it was only for 8 hours it seemed like a lifetime.  I did have a good time messing with my uncle and family though.

Ok funny story then I’ll wrap it up… you know I like to ramble. So I listen to the Rickey Smiley Morning Show every morning (its hilarious)…ok anyway Rickey is always mispronouncing words…so the morning crew incorporated a bell.  Anytime someone mispronounces a word they ring the bell.

Well yesterday scratch that my uncle is always mispronouncing words and proudly too (because he just knows he is right). For example…he said,  "I got on my computer and I STROLLED down and the stuff was gone." My facial expression at this point was -à o_O  I then tapped the bell said *ahem* you mean "scroll." The bell got quite a bit of use with him trying to say Bass Pro Shop...kept getting tongue tied! LOL...

Well the end of  my visit was when my uncle decide to tell us the story of how he remembers when he learned to walk! OK OK...

You remember when you were 10 months old and you are 52 yrs old now and don’t remember what you did last week! HILARIOUS!!! I love that guy! Always giving me a laugh!

Ok, Ok well that’s enough of my rambling! Again, I hope you had a great Thanksgiving and now I shall clean and shop…hopefully all the crazy people who camped out for Black Friday sales have now gone home and I can just ease in and get what I need J

Be blessed! Blog ya later!

I Would Much Rather Shampoo My Hair with My Eyes Taped Open Letting the Shampoo Burn my Corneas' vs. Dating…Part 2 to I Would Much Rather Rip Out My Toenails vs. Dating Again...Life After Break Up or Divorce

*This blog post is dedicated to #94 who has never really left my side and has always been encouraging to me*

Well, here I am doing a part 2 to a blog post I did over a year ago…

Figured it was time to update you all…wait…not that you care but yeah, yeah my blog so you are forced to read! *evil laugh* mwhahahahahahahahahahaha!

Ok well let’s see guess you can say I tried all the things in the post previously so let’s recap from that shall we… 

First encounter

 Meeting someone at a store…well as I instructed at the end of that blog.  Don’t go looking let that person find you.  Here goes…

Well, I went into a local auto parts store in search of an item.  Well there was a certain gentleman who walked by and smiled.  Guess you could say he caught my eye.  Well of course me being the lady I am (psshh LOL I’m a total tomboy) *ahem* anyways I just smiled back.  I went about finding what I needed and proceeded to exit the store when all of a sudden I heard in a Latino accent “Bonita” well, well I thought hmmm I know what that means… (Beautiful) and I looked back and he was waving…I stopped we conversed. OK, blah, blah went on a date yada yada…Ok you wanna know how this turned out…

Happily ever after!! YYYYEAAAHHHHH RRIIIGGGHHHTTT NO!!! Stalker type! RED ALERT..RED ALERT. Nice dude but boy he was super dee duper clingy like a pair of jean after a water ride! 

For example, after one date you call me mid date at work saying “I MIIIIISSSSS YOOOOUUUUU”…ok I was holding the phone at work with this facial expression o_O like really? You have got to be kidding me?

After several attempts of evasiveness, unreturned phone calls, unanswered texts I finally again told him AGAIN, yeah I don’t think I’m ready for all this (which I really don’t think I was but even so after 1 day! Are you friggin kidding me #fail).

Next up:  Friend Set up

So I was chatting it up with an old friend and she was saying “hey I know a great guy for you.”  Me thinking to myself ummmm did I ask for you to set me up? In me, saying “hey what’s going on you with you did I inadvertently say “please set me up?” No? Ok I didn’t think so…anyways moving on along.  I said ok fine, whatever, who is he blah blah so she says can I give him your number…I say you most certainly cannot.  I said but you can give him my Google voice number (I shall go over this very important necessity at the end of this blog post). Anyways so he text and emailed me a picture…ok wwweeeeeelllll red flag number one.  The picture of was him far off sitting down! Whenever someone takes a picture that far off they are hiding something. Well I know what it was here…anyways. So I said well how you would describe yourself.  He said 6’2, tall (ok no kidding you said 6’2 anyways), ATHLETIC BUILD, honest, homebody etc.  I thought yeah ok. So he asked me out to lunch since we work in close proximity to one another.  Sure set up a meeting lunch date.  These are perfect! Why you ask I’ll tell you why because you have an hour to get to know someone. If you’re not feeling them then you can look forward to that hour ending vs. being on a date with an endless night all awkward.  Well first we met…remember a lil while ago I said he described himself as ATHLETIC BUILD…

Well apparently that was back in high school because this guy was two Twinkies from obesity!! Next up he said he was a homebody…the entire time he talked about clubs and liquor…two things that don’t excite me. So as I sat there trying not to be rude but man I was totally bored about of my mind.

You know after that I was like eh blah blah a few dates with others here and there.  Not bad guys but not anything I want and I felt I wasn’t ready and you know sometime we have to stop and be patient. Don’t force it. Let God guide us. Sometimes it takes us to be alone  and content with ourselves  to understand that! 

One main thing that I’ve had during my split and all other crap  is a really good friend! Actually the best friend in the world besides family.  When I went through everything he was there…I sat and thought about it and wow. Always a shoulder to lean on and a listening ear. When I needed to be critiqued he or corrected he did so even if I got an attitude.  When I cried or was angry he was still there. Very attentive etc it’s funny how we take those things for granted.  Funny thing is I then developed feelings which then made me push him away and did things uncharacteristic of myself all to protect myself.  Well folks that’s what fear will do to you! Not proud of it but…is what it is I guess.

However, we recently had a conversation about Faith…and what that really means.  Faith I explained, is just believing. Well …this post will be a way I should you how one can step out on Faith…and say…

#94 you have been the bestest friend a girl could have…you have every trait that I want in a man and put up with me when you could have just written me off! Of course none of us are perfect…Lord knows I’m not. I have prayed long and hard on this and I know it’s time for me to step out on Faith as I speak about so often. Now,  I have made mistakes and not handled things in the best manner but I sure hope you have forgiven me. 

Ok, now I say all that to say this folks! Keep faith the one for you is looking for you or better yet look around he/she may be already by your side! Don’t wait til it’s too late! …Oh wait..I forgot to give you info to the dating must have…a lil invention called...

Google Voice is awesome…it allows you to have a phone number... whatever number you want that will ring to your phone or whatever phone you specify.  The beauty in it is the person never really truly has your phone number (also great for when you are signing up for stuff online etc) .  You can go online or use the mobile  app on your phone to block, text, get vmails etc. It’s awesome! Here is a link if you want to try it out…best of all its FREE!! https://www.google.com/voice

Blog ya later!!

Don't Judge Me!!!

.I have been meaning to blog about this but just have been a bit busy lately...hey what do I keep telling you about that judging me thing! STOP IT!  HA HA...well miss me? Yeah I missed you too *hugs my readers*. Ok, now that I got that mushy stuff out of the way, I wanted to tell you about a lesson that I taught my 5 yr old daughter complete with a visual aid.

Here we go...this was the night of June 25, 2011.  We were with some friends and getting some frozen yogurt at a new establishment. Which by the way was so friggin good, oh but I digress. When we left from Peachwave (name of the awesome frozen yogurt place) we crossed the street to find a man chained to a light pole with a blind fold and his mouth taped. Somewhat like this picture (but he was not a business man at least not dressed like one that night) 

At any rate as we got closer he has a sign on his around his neck that read...

"This is a silent protest of gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and transsexuals, to demonstrate how this group of people have be silenced and unable to be free." 

I thought to myself hmm that's an interesting protest.  Well as I let this all sync in three things happened. 1) My 5 yr old daughter was demanding to know what was going on  2) the homeless guys behind the man began taunting and cursing at the man 3) 3 KCPD cars showed up in full force.

Well my daughter asked me, "Mommy what is that man doing?"  I just said remember when I told you we have to stand up for we believe in like when you had your issues at school? She said yes mommy...I said well that is what that man is doing.  He believes in something and he is protesting for what he feels is right.  She said oooooooh ok, she said do you think its right. I said what he believes?  I said well sweetie,  I believe that we have a right to protest what we believe in.  I said and what he is doing is very brave so never be afraid to stand up! 

Well after I explained that to her then we have Tom, Dick and Harry the homeless guys heckling the silent protester.  Yelling at him, calling him names telling him how wrong he is for his beliefs/lifestyle... well people, I have to be honest...this frankly pissed me off!  This blog is not about gay rights etc...but I was pissed off because you know that whole judgement thing I joke about, where here it was live and in color.  

They kept going and my reaction was an instant ... followed by me yelling..

"Really, really you going to yell and tell this man how wrong he is, like your lives have turned our right (I know I was wrong for that but geez).  Ain't that a bout a b&^$!, as soon as he uncuffs himself you'll ask him for a dollar.  So don't judge anyone! You hate when folks look down on you for being homeless." 
 Oh the nerve of some people... Next up we have 3 cops cars...my thought here again was is this really necessary...6 cops for one guy who has been apparently chained to this pole for hours.  They were ready to taze and take him in. I really felt it to be unnecessary what happened to the right of assembly and protest.  The man was clearly not bothering anyone.

One thing that this incident made me reflect on is something that my daughter said.  She said "ok mom, so he is different?"  I said "yes sweetie he is different...", before I could say anything else she said" but thats ok because God made and loves us all."

All I could do was smile...because as the bible says the truth comes out of the mouths of babes. God's Love, Grace and Mercy knows no boundaries.   I am not saying I am in support or against any thing.What I am saying is that we are all unique we are all God's children and one sin is no greater than another.  It is easy to judge someone or show prejudice and not even realize it, why because we are all sinners and we all do it...ALL OF US.  However, let's try to remember to love one another as God loves us in all our wretchedness.  We do alot of things displeasing to God but guess what he loves us anyway undeserving and all.Why? because he is awesome.

So blog ya later but one image I want to leave you with is this..  

Christ didn't just die for one group of people He died for us all, we are all God's children.  He paid the price for our sins with his blood.  Jesus paid it all and all to him we owe! So he is the only one worthy of judging us.  Remember when you point a finger at someone you have three more point back at you.  Also, the methods in which you judge someone, so will you be judged.  So just remember to Love one another accept differences. They are that persons cross to bare not yours so why are you so bothered by it (and this is not just on sexual orientation, its on everything)?  I''m just saying....and if there are things not right in your eyes of what you see it in the bible then you know what  rest assured that God doesn't need your help in his judgments.  He will be the judge of us all, so let him do his job and you do you.  Sound fair...thought so...K? Well blog ya later homies :)

Desserts spelled backwards is...

Well hello!! Long time no see huh? Yeah well I've had a lot to say yet nothing at all so there, take that!! Speaking of which tonight I said hey I really feel like blogging...so I get home, get comfy, grab my snacks, then my A.D.D kicks in.  I started tweeting, sending texts, checking Facebook, play a little Wii and the list goes on everything but blog.  Finally, I sit down crack the ol knuckles and what happens...*blank stare* yup completely blank.

 I spend my days non stop thinking and when its time to regurgitate my thoughts on this screen, I can't.  Hmm that's rich!  So here I am...blank staring the screen while you read me rambling...ha ha time wasted out of your life.  JUST KIDDING!! Well not about the drawing a blank but about you wasting your time, calm down! At any rate, guess I'll enlighten you to what's been going on with me.

Well my mood lately has been a bit how shall we say scatter brained.  You ever have those feelings of having so much going on that you truly have no idea of if you are coming or going?! Yeah well you know what I feel about that feeling...it sucks

What do you do when you stress level is at death-con 5...

What do you do? Grab a glass o wine or just become a professional booze hound?

Well I guess is that works for ya, I won't judge you. Yeah not the route for me...

Hmm well is that not you either? Then who are you the chain smoker?

Again not me...

Are you the person who then just turns into more of a work a holic?

Yeah that one I think used to be me....but I've evolved...I'm going to be totally honest and say with all the stress I do two things turn into...

and

Is this the first time I've been pulled in several directions?

Well.no, of course not but for some reason I can be honest enough to say sometimes we have so much on us that we have a hard time handling it when someone else adds that nice little cherry on top.

Well I know what your thinking ok yeah well...well the point is...

  the stress isn't going away.

BUT we can evaluate and decide what things we can get rid of or change to de-stress some.  I know that sounds corny but hey whatever, it works.  I did just what I said and sat down and thought what is really getting to me...some things I cannot control so, I said OK those things are what they are.  However, within those situations there were things I could just accept and move on, because guess what.  They aren't going to change and we can only control ourselves and our actions.  Then I thought about any extra unnecessary stress and there was some of that as well.  So what did I do...let go or at least made a conscious effort to let it go .  No sense in hanging on, right?! Right!

Life is soooo short and we cannot spend our time just stressed out.  We can be here today and gone tomorrow.  God gave us today as a present thus why we live in the present.  Let's step back put it in perspective and think about who we can be a blessing too. Because think about it...no matter how bad our situation TRUST me there is someone else's situation that is 10x worse!

Once we get out of our own way and let God lead doors will open up that we never knew were even there in all aspects of our lives. Chose to de-stress. choose happiness although Lord knows that isn't always easy! You can do it I know you can! Ok blog ya later! :)

Watch Out Now...Eye Candy Blog...

Well what a rarity this is…another blog from my inbox that I felt compared to share! Just had too! Well I know some of you like eye candy calendars…well I know it’s May and the year is almost half over…but whatever…don’t judge me. I’m helping you out here!! Just thought you guys might want to check out these babes! I sure hope they make one of guys for us ladies! LOL!! This actually cracked me up almost to the point of tears!!

Well without further ado….the Miss TSA Airport 2011 Calendar.

This blog was brought you by the letter "R" for ridiculous LOL!! Thanks EC for the email! Please note if you enjoy my blog hit that "follow" button on the right hand side there...

Blog ya later, probably sooner vs later!

You! Yes, You! You Need to Come Here & TRY THIS!

OK, so I am on a roll folks! Posting two blog entries in two days...SHUT UP (figure of speech)

OK, now let's get down to serious business! OK, mybe not, but we will get back to moments of pure silliness.  Now I normally don't share emails but this one was HILARIOUS to me. Why, you ask? Well because I could totally see myself being just like this retired husband.  Hey, who am I kidding I would do some of this stuff now and heck I already have! However it did give me a few ideas! I have added my own commentary inside the asterisks and of course we have to have graphics to make it even more hilarious! Hope this helps lifts your spirits or keeps your already up spirits up...wait did that make sense? Probably not, but you know what so what! HA! you don't like it feel free to call 1-800-WHO-CARES and press 1273940582030488 then wait for the next available rep! Now without further ado here is the email I wants to share that I received from a VERY special person who I will refer to as...*secret agent voice*.... Number..94

THE RETIRED HUSBAND

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to

Target.

Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get

in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves

to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target:

Dear Mrs. Harris,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our

store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of

you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are

listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other

people's carts when they weren't looking.   

**Sweet I did this to my mom before, tee hee**

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

**I am guilty of doing this in electronics but I set them to go off after the store was close so the folks opening would come in to plenty o' noise**

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the

women's restroom.  **Making notes to do this one**

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,

'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to

leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that

in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and

costing the company money.  

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on

layaway.  

**Love it I think I will try with twizzlers**

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 

**OMG Not funny but funny**

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children

shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from

the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and

screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.  

**For the record, I would totally do this!**

9 September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror

while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked

the clerk where the antidepressants were.  

**All you can do is shake your head on this one LOL!!**

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the

' Mission Impossible' theme.  

**Yup I have done that while riding in a cart...hey don't judge me!!**

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by

using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,

yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'  **NNIIIICCCCEEEEEE**

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed

a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then

yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the

clerks passed out.  **CLASSIC THIS IS A MUST TRY**

This story was hilarious to me.  I love to laugh at myself and not be so serious all the time! It will help your spirit! Try it sometimes! I dare you take one of these things and try it! I bet you will laugh!! OK, as all the famous people say..."Well that's my time! God Bless!!"

Blog ya later, remember keep your head up!

Sometimes Ish Just Ain't Funny!

I'm up late and been doing a lot of thinking...scary huh? Yeah I know, who are you telling! Well ya know my theme is I laugh to keep from crying.  We all have those days if you haven't then either your dead or in extreme denial or you friggin live in Care-Alot with the Care Bears, either way seek counseling but sometimes Ish just ain't funny!.

At any rate... you have those days when you wake up on the right side of the bed with a positive attitude and you seemed to get slapped in the face?  You turn the other cheek and  then you get slapped on that cheek too.  Well friends it happens to us all.  Sucks too, doesn't it! Well i'm here to tell you to be encouraged.  When things or people get you down rather it be personal life, family, friends whatever just hang in there! You are loved!! When you feel down do something nice for someone it will always cheer you up.  Rather its saying a kind word, sending an encouraging text (not a chain letter either grrrrrr) lol or helping out a friend or better yet a stranger, you will see yourself get your mojo back and hopefully begin to smile.  It's hard sometimes to say shake it off, but we have to try.  Otherwise we stay with that little black cloud over us in the rain and negativity is contagios.
We all go through trials and tribulations BUT after every storm the sun comes out and it seems to shine brighter than ever!  
We go through tests so we can have a testimony of where we have been what we have gone through but how we overcame it.  I am here to tell you , it wasn't you, SORRY.  It was only by God's mercy and grace! Rather you are a believer or not it is true and God loves you anyway.  The enemy is strong and will try to bring you down but God is stronger!
Keep striving to be the best YOU that you can be! Sometimes its not easy trust me I know but lets shoot for a positive spirit.  It will show in your life and to others who need to be uplifted! As the song says...my sunshine has come and there's no more rain in this cloud! Just be encouraged whatever you are going through big or small...you can and will get through it! I promise! Remember you can't have a positive life with a negative mind!
That was just in in my heart to blog...this is a journey I am on along with you friends!
...now my eyes are burning and I am going to sleep.  Aaaaand I'm probably going to be be dragging at work tomorrow . Blog ya later Amigos!