Random WTH's We Encounter Everyday

Ok first of all I guess I should define what the acronym WTH is...well it means 'what the hell?!' It is a term that I use quite often...can't help it. One more I should familiarize you with is 'smh' which means 'shaking my head.' Ok now I will give you a couple examples to make sure you are comfortable and get it.

Example #1: = WTH or SMH?! Get it? Ok good.

Example #2 =WTH or an SMH.

***********************************************************************************

Ok now that we have the linguistics out the way. Let's get to the topic at hand... some random everyday things that make you go WTH?! or just smh.

#1 SKINNY JEANS especially on guys!

<---thats gotta hurt...

OK OMG!!! This is such a bad look that I wish would just die and go back to where it came from. I mean on what planet do these look right? I cannot believe guys are even going for those but I guess they want to be on the cutting edge of fashion, but these bad boys looks like they are on the cutting edge of something alright, something that will hurt if you move too fast the wrong way.

Part 2 to Skinny Jean...lol Sagging Skinny Jeans...

Ok this is a big WTH?! Really fella's does this look right to you? Not a good look...I repeat...not a good look!

Two big problems here...

#1 They are saggin skinny jeans

#2 The 80's multiple colors with the matching shoes...really?! You gunna do that huh? In twitter world this would be known as an #UtterFail and an over all hot mess. So skinny jeans overall get a big fat WTH?!

#2 Natural Hair : It is not for everyone

Yeah I said it!! And...? If you are not going to keep it up or if it just looks a mess then don't do it!! If your hair looks like it could be featured in the movie Saw as one of Jigsaws traps then you need to do something different. This topic is not exclusive to any one group of people.

Look at these WTH?! Natural Hair styles...

< 'Really home girl needs to part and grease. Come on now.'

Wow I can honestly say I didn't think a white guys hair could look like this...Did he stick his finger in a socket or what? WTH?!


Last but not least look at this, there is no caption to capture the essence of the WTH-ness...

I mean look at this what really can you say?! Other than WTH?! What crawled up in his head and died?!

#2 Hair Part 2: Styles

OK so the natural hair is getting out of hand on some folks but the some of these hairstyles period are just a bit outlandish and just simply put look like 'who did it and what for?!' Don't believe me? Oh well let me show you then. Mr or Ms/Mrs Doubty pants...I double triple dog dare you not to say WTH?! Can you do it...? Here we go...

Even the lady in the background is looking at her like WTH?!

Yeah not sure what that is...other than WTH?!

This right here is hotmessness taken to a whole nother level...not sure if that is a real word but whatever...ya heard it here first folks. WTH?!

smh folks

#3 Tattoos

I am probably in the minor regarding tattoos. I have none "and why?" you ask. Well i'm not a needle person so I deal with them when I have too, BUT for me to pay someone to dig in my skin with a needle?! Well let's just say I'm good on that, I'll pass. However, just because I don't have any doesn't mean I don't know a hot mess when I see one. Curious as to what I am talking about, well let's dive in shall we?

Tattoo fau paux #1

Bad artwork...really folks this is a permanent thing on your body how about you check out the tattoo artist before you sit down and let them go to work diggin in your skin with ink. Otherwise, you might end up like this poor guy...

Tattoo faux paux #2

Tackiness…this is just a common sense thing, I think. This is one of those things where you sit down in the chair and you think... “self do I really want to tattoo this on my body which I have to look at all the time (unless it’s on your back) and that's permanent, hmm do I?” Well some people are just idiots, do it anyway and then end up with tattoos like this…which get a WTH and a SMH.

Really dude you love your genitals sooooo much you had to get them tattooed on under your armpit…*blank stare*…RRRIIIGGGHHHHTTT! WTH?! Someone should just put baby powder all over their hands and just smack hip across the face. SMH!

Tattoo of a woman’s open legs…this right here is a sure sign of someone who isn’t getting any if he needs this tattoo…I’m just saying. I hope he doesn’t have any daughters how do you possible explain that one?

Tattoo faux paux #3

Skin tone.,.yeah I SAID IT!! If you are as dark as an asphalt road and want a tattoo you need to :

A) Pay the extra money for the white ink they have or

B) Just don’t waste your money.

Why you ask? Well because who can see that?! Yeah even your squinting to see it and then you got color HA can’t see that either. Again…WTH?! I'm just being honest.

Prime example here folks…Shaq. We love Shaq yes we do…BUT, can you tell me what that tattoo say or what it is a picture of? Hmmm….Don’t worry I’ll wait…*taps foot patiently*. I’m just saying.

Tattoo faux paux #4
Spell Check anyone? Ok, it’s one idiotic thing to get a girlfriend or boyfriend’s name tattooed on you or to get your favorite saying etc. BUT dude c’mon at least make sure your tattoo artist AT LEAST has a GED and can spell or you will end up like this WTH tattoos. SMH

<Really dude don't you just look cool...NOT BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! Bless his heart!

Awww he wanted to tell the world how awesome he is and now they know how not awesome he is and the fact that he’s a little special because he has a misspelled tattoo on his back. Sheer comedy I tell you. WTH?!

...Coming up next blog: Bathroom & Elevator Etiquette at Work

A Weird is Normal Poetic Moment

Well the first few blogs came with humor and a message. This one comes the same way buuuuuttt not with as much humor but still a message. This entry is more heart felt. Sometimes I get deep in thought and reflection. Often about life, love and what God has in store for me. Often times we struggle mentally and emotionally with those things. I use poetry as an outlet for these things. Now I am no Maya Angelou but decided to share my poetic thoughts. Just decided to post a couple of poems that I wrote from the heart a few years ago (but they still prove true today). One of them is titled I laugh to keep from cryinig which is how I came up with my blog name. Well here goes. I hope you enjoy....

Laugh 2 Keep from Crying

I'm trying so hard to do what's right,

beaten down like I've been in a fight,

but you could never tell...

I'm going through hell

so many obligations and so many resctrictions

but it's ok I'll get over my conflictions

when you see me I'm silly, laughing and joking

but let me let you in on a secret...

I laugh to keep from crying

I've been through family and friends dying

spouse and good friends lying

making myself a success...

I'm really trying

but I just pray

and I just laugh to keep from crying

I'm struggling to stay up

because people and this world are so corrupt

I'm making ends meet

and we'll end up on our feet

God may let me bend yet never break

He won't put more on me than I can take...

I have that faith but when it gets hard
I just keep my head up and...

Laugh to keep from crying.

Mind Complexities

When you look in my mind, whatever you seek, I hope you find,

Be careful, my ming will engulf, tantalite and confuse you,

Have you in a daze no clue what to do, have you zonin' out,

Wonderin' what this life is all about, enter my cranial flow,
You sure you wanna go? Once you enter your mind will blow,

Like a harsh wind during a thunderstorm,

But don't look surprised because you were warned,

Told all of this ahead of time that when you enter my thoughts

they will blow your mind, deep unclear juxtaposed thoughts,

Contemplating one another, but I know my love for God and none other,

The one I chose, my heart lye's with, never once have I played tricks,

I ignite minds with my heart and soul, these things I must unfold,

Not looking for pampering and charity, but instead providing clarity,

Never realized I could flow with such cluster of words,

Dropping emotions in ways never thought of or heard,

That's because it's the speech of the soul, the language of the heart,

A new communication I'm gunna start, well not me,

The language has lingered and lived an eternity,

Allowing my emotions to soar, foolishness no more,

Pure in my mind down to my core,

Good sensations bring fascination with my interpretation, of love,

Which can bring things to the mind never thought of, bad thoughts I leave,

Now in my cerebrum you have traveled, now entwined,

Can you unravel, out of my mind? our of the mental dimensions of me,

To escape back to reality.

Until next time...Thanks for stopping by and I hope ya'll come back nah! Ya hear!?

What the Hell are They Talking About in Music Today...

Ok, Ok, I just felt compelled to post this blog...maybe you agree maybe you don't. Who knows, but guess what? It's my blog so ha ha!! Juuuuuust kidding. At any rate getting back to the reasons I felt compelled to post this blog regarding some of the music today is the following:

I can't listen to the radio with my child in the car without having to change the channel because of the lyrics of some of the music allowed on the radio. Now I understand the whole freedom of speech, I get that...Lord knows I have some stuff in my ipod that is not "kid friendly," however I listen to it without my child around. BUT the radio is public, it's sad that some of these songs are played around the time kids are going to school or getting out of school. Which leaves some parents riding in silence, popping in a CD or turning on a iPod. Why you ask? Well, because I don't know about you, but I don't want my kid singing Rude Boy by Rihanna talking about 'Getting it up'...She is 4. Or the 'neighbors know my name' by Trey Songz?! Are you kidding me! We have to do better as a society we say we care about our children but we need to show it. Some lyrics get through that are so not child appropriate, now im not saying it needs to be Radio Disney but c'mon. How many kids know every word to Lil Wayne's CD but don't even know their ABC's. Maybe have certain times of the day to play certain songs...I don't know...but that is not what this blog is solely about so let's move on to the next main topic...

Lyrical content...Which is the main theme. What the hell are some of these artist talking about...I mean...come on really?! Either every other word is a cuss word or its just so vulger that it would make a sailor blush. I listen to songs with cussing but when every other word is s&^% or F*&^ or P*^&( then you lose me). Besides the song should tell a story about something but I guess with some sort of class. But hey what do I know...pssssshhhhh class what's that?! So you still confused about what I am talking about well lets do a brief review of 3 songs I have chosen . I will post the lyrics and even the youtube videos for your laughing I mean listening pleasure (actually pretty sad). So ridiculous that you laugh because its soo pathetic... Ready? Ok, after you...llleetttt's go...

Pregnant Lyrics: R.Kelly, Tyrese, Robin Thicke, The Dream

Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
Lay your body down and get you pregnant,
Knock you up, pregnant, Knock you up

Can you believe I’m in the club with a girl who has a man,
And take her to the hotel for just a one night stand,
See I’m a playa so I ain’t tryna take her on no dates,
To much like my patrone man I’m just tryna take it straight,
Untill I met this girl in the club with an unbelievable booty,
Sweetest girl in the world and I mean it and on top of that shes a cutie,
I ain’t seen nothing like her around here in a while,
And if I had a girl she’d be the one to bear my child,
Telling myself I’m a playa so I keep tryna shake it off,
But I keep on seeing this big old house with a picket fence and a dog,
Never felt nothing like this,
Shes more than a mistress enough to handle my buisness,
Now put that girl in my kitchen,

Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
That’s what I told her,
Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
Lay your body down and get you pregnant,
Like you are,
Knock you up, pregnant,

All the pretty ladies please line up right next to me,
How would you like to go on a little trip with your boy Tyrese,
Raise your hand if you want me to fulfill your fantasy,
I can hide your co-star and get in one of my new wiis,
Tell me what your name is,
I can make you famous,
We can pop champagne and get right down to sexing,
Now I ain’t got nothing to do tonight I gotta wait for my crew,
I just wanna put some in you,
And I can tell that you want it too,
And I’m ready babe,
And your ready babe,
So let’s go get out of this club,
Kel’s and Rys after party,
You can F*** with us,

Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant,
Lay your body down and get you pregnant,
Knock you up, pregnant.

Ok now honestly after reading that..aren't you like...

I know I was when I first heard this mess. Oh but it gets worse you don't believe me...ok Ill keep going...

Next up...a song that makes absolutely no sense but out of the nonsense is one phrase to demean women! WWWHHHHYYYYYY does this get air time....HHHHHOOOOOWWWWW are they getting paid off this mess...Im not being a hater Im simply saying are you friggin kidding me...really?!

Shorty Da Kidd ft. Loudy -
Wah Wah Wow
AYE THIS YO BOY LOUDY ON THE TRACK AND I GOT THE PRINCE OF THE CITY WIT ME TELLEM SHORTY YES SIR NIGGAS TRYNA JOC MY STYLE OK I SEE THEM NIGGAS TRYNA JOC MY NIGGAS OK I SEE THEM NIGGAS TRYNA JOC MY STYLE AYE WHAT THEY YELLIN OUT ITS GCB

CHORUS
AYE MAN WE HIT EM WITH THAT WAH WAH WOW WAH WAH WOW WOW WOW WAH WAH WOW OL RATCHET ASS HOE RATCHET ASS HO RATCHET ASS HO RATCHET ASS HO

VERSE 1

AYE SEE YEAH ME MAN I KNOW THEM GURLS THAT COULD BE RATCHET WHOLE GC DONE BEAT IT ON THAT MATTRESS AYE YO I HEAR THEM HATERZ JOCCIN PLEASE ITS GCB WE TELLIN GET OFF OF THESE BEATS IN YO EAR YO LOUDY I GOT MY SWAGG UP AND WHEN I STEP UP IN THE CLUB IM GETTIN HELLAS SUBTRACT THE CLOTHES AND SHE SAY MY PAPER ADD UP SO I TELL HER DIVIDE MY POLE LIKE ITS BAD LUCK HOLD ON HOLD ON MOE HOLD ON MOE YOU DONT WANNA SAY NO MO NIGGAS TALK QUICK BUT THEY MOVE SLO MO AINT SAYIN NO NAMES BUT WHO DONT KNOW HOLD ON HOLD ON MOE HOLD ON MOE WHAT YOU WANNA DO BETTA COME EQUIPT WITH A CLICK THAT THICK IF YOU REALLY WANNA TRIP IMA SHOW YOU WHAT MY CLICK GONE DO

CHORUS

VERSE 2

AYE YO IT STARTED AT THE RIO AMP, ACE ,ZOE, LAST , C-SQUARE AND THEO NOW EVERYWHERE THAT WE GO THEY THROWIN UP THEY HANDS THEY KNOW ITS GCB SO THEY BE LIKE DO YO DANCE WAH WAH WOW JAY J I GOT EM KRAZY, NICKY NICK, SNAKE SHEAUN, YAYA, AND HB NOW LOOK AROUND I CAN SEE WHY THEY HATE ME CUZ GC IS LIKE TV IN HD WAH WAH WOW SHOUT OUT TO MY HOMIIE T-RELL MESSIN WIT US MAN YOU BETTA GAURD YO FEMALES YOU SHRIM NIGGAS YOU GET HIT WITH THEM SEA SHELLS AND WELL LET YO FAMILY KNOW VIA E-MAIL WAH WAH WOW WHEN WE STEP UP IN THE PARTY LIGHT SKINNED GIRLS RUN UP TO YO NIGGA SHORTY DARK SKINNED GURLS RUN UP TO MY NIGGA LOUDY WHEN THE CLUB IS WAY TO OVER CROWDED



Ok and if those two were not bad enough...this one takes the cake!! I mean really who does this...I would hope as women we would have more respect. If not, at least don't publicize it...sweet Jesus. No man is worth all that! You are wondering in what I am referring too? Well without further ado...


Let Me Smell Yo Dick by: Riskay
(Opening)
Nigga this the fifth teeth muthafuckin time that I called and left yo ass messages
I dun text yo bitch ass and you aint responded to nothing
What the fuck is you doin who tha fuck you out there with you think I'm stupid my girls dun already put me up on yo ass tonight night nigga when you get home I got som news foe yo bitch ass

(Chorus 2times)
Why you coming home five in the mone
Somethings going on can I smell yo dick?
Don't play me like a fool cause dat ain't cool
So what you need to do is let me smell yo dick

(Hook 1)
It's four o'clock and I'm sleepin' and it's late night and you creeping you could've told me I'm leavin' now I know you out there cheatin' why you got to do me like dat when I call you don't call me back I'm texting you now nigga where you at that's fucked up why you do me like dat

(Verse 1)
I'm dead sleep and you trickin'
In the club wit dirty foot bitches
My gurl was there she witness
She had a camera phone she took pictures
You was on the dance flo grindin'
With a stripper hoe named Diamond
You was flossin' hard you was shinning
Everything she drink you buyin' it
Fuck nigga you need to stop lien' foe I get mad and pull out my nine
You want a new bitch to fuck that's fine but don't fuck hers and try to fuck mine
You keep tellin me you ain't touch her but some keep tellin me you dun fucked her and I ain't that bitch you want to play wit nigga drop them boxers let me smell yo dick

(Chours 2tyms)
Why you coming home five in the mone
Somethings going on can I smell yo dick?
Don't play me like a fool cause dat ain't cool
So what you need to do is let me smell yo dick

(Unknown)
Smell my dick wait a minute hold up see that's how a bitch get her eyes swoll up and I don't give a damn what yo homegurls seen when I was in the club what the fuck you mean they ain't got no business eyein' me like dat
You ain't got no business tryin' me like dat
I wun even feelin' Diamond like dat I was wildin' but I wasn't clowin' like dat
Dat's alright dat's okay gon head believe what yo homegurl say a nigga like me drink a lot of liquor meet a lot of bitchs take a lot of pictures
I might break bread wit one or two strippers but that don't mean you got to pull my zipper
Thinking I dick down the whole town even though I got dick to go around

(Chorus 2times)
Why you coming home five in the mone
Somethings going on can I smell yo dick?
Don't play me like a fool cause dat ain't cool
So what you need to do is let me smell yo dick.

Ok so honestly tell me your thinking...

I know I am!! What in the friggin world?! The music world is flooded with this mess! Its not just contained to RnB and Rap. Please don't get it twisted I have heard some crazy Rock songs encouraging suicide and country songs about depression an violence as well. I just chose these three since these are genres I listen too. Please, please people we have got to do better in the music we make and as consumers where we put our money!

I Would Much Rather Rip Out My Toenails Vs. Dating Again...Life After Break Up or Divorce

Weeelllll.. you like many Americans, scratch that like many people in the world have just gotten out of a long term relationship or marriage...

Well, I sympathize with you...it's especially bad when the other party has wronged you in some way...I know.. there,there it sucks, I know trust me but join the club we have t-shirts...

Well the one thing I can suggest is to listen and down load the song "I'll Pray For You" by Jaron and the Long Road home (YouTube It). It is quite theraputic...tee hee trust me. Once you've done that and are actively dealing with your anger then guess what time it is? You guessed it it's time to move on. Let's face it who wants to be alone for the rest of your life unless your like 92 and know your days are numbered. Ok, that was just wrong...moving on...

Ok so now let's tackle some of the idiosyncrasies of dating and hell lets be honest, just finding someone to even go out with...

There, there do not fret or be scared although it is a scary dating scene out there. For some of the following reasons...

A) Because you have just a bunch of horny toads out there, male and female. Let's face it everyone is not out just to get laid. My goodness folks have some morals and self respect.

B) You have some down low criminals out there, when I meet someone I find myself whipping out my smartphone and googling them and then on to watchdog.com to ensure they are not a felon or sex offender. *please note felons need love too, but ehhh not so much mine, again just being honest*

C) They are married hell that may have been how you caught your your ex

D) They have no clue what a job is, can't hold a conversation or lets face it, they are just plain weird but not in a weird normal way, of course lol.

Those are just a few reasons but we will get through this together...from one splitee to another. =). I have been away from the dating since for about 10 years *shut up no smart comments on age.*

I asked a few of my single friends, "Hey how do you do this again?" Of course they laughed. I will go over some of the following ideas they gave me and my experiences with those. You may find it humorous but I'm sure you will be able to identify if you have tried any of these.

The Millenium Dating Tactic: Internet/Online Dating Well I have not experienced the picture to the left but many of you have. I have done some online chatting and to my chagrin been basically a waste of time. Either you get a buttload of horny toads sending you random picture of their penises (oh yeah I really want that disease), or you get just complete and utter strange birds talkin in excessive geek talk. Then when they send you a picture you see why they didn't have one up to begin. Then you either just stop talking to them or or give them one word answers till they get the hint and move on. Again, another reality check we can say beauty is on the inside but we are going to be initally attracted with our eyes.

Next up: Club/Bar Scene:

This age old method has been a total bust because you end up seeing the same ol people getting drunk out of this world. Or if your me you get gawked and followed by the ugliest dude in the place, or the cute dude who just wants to nail you. This is my least favorite of them all, I have to say this phase of my life went out in college. The main reason I hate this scene is because it never fails I end up seeing stuff like this...

*Lord help me my eyes are burning...*

Let's move to less evasive dating tactics...let's face it we are not that desperate...right?..right?! Ok then...

The Grocery Store aka Walmart for me:

We all wish there was that fine as wine man with a great smile just waiting for us on the produce aisle to strike up a conversation. Mine would go *ahem* something like this...

Handsome Man (in my head the Rock) "Oh hey there beautiful! let me get that sack of potatoes for you." Me: "Oh why thank you Mr. Handsome man at the grocery store with no ring on." Then we would laugh and progress from there.

Ok,real world what do we really see at the grocery store or Walmart...

This hot mess right here...fella's please don't come out of the house looking like this...Geez!! So we press on to a couple more avenues before we give up...

Next up: The Gym:

Most of the time, I am at the gym like the guys. Honestly, I'm focused on the task at hand, my workout. However, every now and then someone may catch my eye as I'm sure is true for you guys sometimes. Usually it ends there...I am old fashioned and will not approach a guy but if I go into the gym... I usually crack jokes and show more attention to the one that has caught my attention...*Got that ladies, dont miss that hint*

* I.e. while playing basketball talk "stuff".. say things like, while he is holding the basketball "I dont know what your going to do with that you don't know how to use it..." Trust me works everytime. Ehh then you get to talking to them and see ENNNGGHHHH not very bright so yet again we move on. *Please note yet again that would never happen if it were the Rock *wink wink call me*

Last but certainly not least...

CHURCH: The Lord's House

Ok we are not at church for dating we are there to get the Lord's word and spiritual feeding...GOT THAT. However, lets' be real yet again. How many of you ladies noticed the fine gentlemen sitting a few pews over alone? Or fella's saw that beautiful woman doing the same? Well what do you do? Hell, I don't know again being honest. I haven't found that at church not to say I wouldn't but so far all the good looking ones are married. Which yay for them right that was me before. I'll expand on this one more as it happens. Expected more in this section didn't you? Please beware though the devil is in church too. So we must be careful here as well. Ha ha sorry.

Moral of this blog is: We cannot look for, seek out and find the mate for us. We have to sit back live our lives, pray and when God is ready to bless us with that special "right" someone this time we will be ready. That special someone could be at any of the above situation or in thousands of other situations. I feel the fustration with dating lol so I chose to blog in jest about it. HEY!! who ever gets this chica *ahem The Rock call me!* Will have a good one on their hands. So stay in prayer and live your life and let Mr./Mrs. Right find you but don't waste time with Mr/Mrs Wrong, I don't care if the sex is good...you got that!!

Til next time...

Blogging Virgin

Well I've been saying for a while I should start blogging, and today just happened to be the day I said ok. I always keep a journal but eh this is more in the millineum. Ok, so I have decided I will have a couple of rules with "MY" blog... lol

1. Punctuation and spelling. Yeah I will try to be on point but if I get on a roll and/or passionate about something then damn it punctuation and/or grammer may go right out the door. I'll try to proof but if I miss something then...whatever please no comments about it. There are bigger fish to fry.

2. Although I am trying and striving to be more Christian sometime my views, opinion and certain life situations may have me step out of that momentarily. Just being honest but I do not need anything judgemental said. Usually I correct my own self in this area if you say something out of L-O-V-then that is different. If you are trying to slap me and tell me to snap out of it. lol

3. Have fun!! Awww yeah Sweet Jesus what is the point in doing something serious all the damn time if I wanted to do that I would go back to school for another degree.

4. Please note if you are a male (ages 28-35) and cute make sure you leave contact info and include a photo...tee hee ok just kidding..a lil

5. Only 4 rules =)

Here we go...I hope to entertain and have fun with my blog. Hope you enjoy!